I Struggle. Do You?

The struggle is real, right? Whatever struggle that phrase refers to, it certainly applies to motherhood. The motherhood struggle is the realest of the real. I struggle. Do you? It’s not so much a question or a complaint, it is a simple statement of fact. 

I struggle with balance. Balance between meeting the needs of my family while not forgetting about myself. Balance in my marriage. Balance in my friendships. 

I struggle with worry. We could drown in the worry of raising children if we allowed ourselves too.

I struggle with ‘sitting back’ versus ‘stepping in.’

I struggle with the never ending game of ‘this is a lesson that needs to be taught’ and giving in to avoid the chaos.

I struggle with answers to the tough questions.

I struggle with the guilt. No need to elaborate here – mom guilt is real and it is nothing short of awful. 

I struggle with patience. Some days I lose it by 9AM. 

I struggle with fairness. Fairness between my children and what sometimes FEELS like an unfair balance within my own home.

I struggle with the occasional bitterness, maybe over the lack of fairness?
Bitterness is a real bitch.

I struggle with enjoying and being in the moment when my mind is clouded with an endless to-do list. 

I struggle with discipline. With what is right for each of my children and being consistent.

I struggle with fitting everything in. It truly feels like there are not enough hours in the day and no matter how much gets done, there are hours of tasks left to do.

I struggle with exhaustion – the physical and emotional exhaustion because they go hand-in-hand in motherhood.

I struggle with the questions and self-doubt. Am I doing the right thing? Am I making the right choice? Am I doing what is best for whatever child I’m fretting over on that particular day.

I struggle with the mind-F that is wanting time alone and time to take care of myself versus feeling guilty for leaving my family and not wanting to miss a single moment. I mean, for real? FOR REAL.

I struggle with the control of motherhood. If you are a control freak like me or not, there is a certain type of control that comes with motherhood. Our way is always better, right? But we can’t have it both ways. We can’t NEED and want help but refuse to let pieces of that control go.

I struggle with the love because sometimes it just feels like too much. How can we love these little people so much? It is straight-up overwhelming. 

And before you get all worried about me and this struggle-list, as I’m going to call it, don’t be worried. There is no sympathy needed. I consider myself to be a happy, healthy, strong woman and a pretty damn good mother. But do you know any other role, any other job or privilege or position, where you experience this much struggle? There isn’t one, I am convinced of that. Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. So today, I’m owning it. I’m am a healthy, happy adult and a B+ mom, but I strugggggle. Thankfully we have the love and the joy and all that mushy stuff to overcome and outweigh the struggle. But it doesn’t mean that the struggle isn’t still there and we would be doing ourselves a disservice to ignore it completely. 

The Motherhood Struggle, that is what it should be called. The title may pose the question, but it doesn’t need to be asked. I struggle and you do too. If you root for me, I’ll root for you and somehow, someway, we’ll survive the Motherhood Struggle. 

Mommy Diatribes